The Pilgrimage to Your Heart…

Words are lying in disarray,
You know what I mean, don’t you?
It is with you that I find profound solace
A place so calm and peaceful

The skies have turned murky
And moving forward is a daunting task
I have been struggling to get things going
For the path I took was insurmountable and rough

The journey is wearing me out
But I’d keep on moving
If I give up, all hope would perish
Never to return

I always knew there was a place
Later, it dawned on me that it was just a trick
Wanted an immediate answer
It hurt me immensely and I felt cheated
Despite despondence, I’d like to keep you close to my heart
My voice is falling apart
You kissed my cheek and smiled, rather nonchalantly
I realized that the journey was complete
I had conquered the final frontier…

Picture courtesy: Pinterest

Apologies of a lover…

Today, when I closed my eyes

Deep down into the depths of sleep

I could not hear myself weep,

But I know you heard my cries

I could hear your voice calling me

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And then the enchantment broke

Out of nowhere, my throat began to choke

And then in my mind, although without reason

Flashed memories of the blissful season

Of the moments we had spent together, in a world of our own

without you I feel like I’m wasted, I’m being thrown

And soon I realized, my love had turned into addiction

 

connection Poster

 

It was all real, it wasn’t fiction

But then, my mind entered into a line of thought

I felt I had gone a bit too far, from rainfall to draught

I got to know, I had gone completely wrong

I had fallen weak at a time when I should have been strong

Out of despondence and out of insecurity

I saw how vulnerable I had fallen

I was being swept away, I was being stolen

 

You showed me everything which was holding me back

When you are there my life’s on track

I said ‘ I love you’

And I know I really do

I said ‘I love you’

Because I could see myself in you

But I am sorry for revealing what I felt

I thought you would tell me how this problem is to be dealt

 

I am sorry for crossing the limit

I am such a coward, meek and timid

Everything happened because of my fear

For I want you to be near

So, let us be friends yet again, the best of them

For your friendship turned me into a gem

 

So, to conclude the story

I can only say I’m sorry

We can’t be together as lovers, I guess it is true

But as the best of friends, I have chosen you

Because when I went out to search for faithfulness in the world,

I found you
It is your smile which keeps me moving

Because you held my hand and drove me out of the dark

And, when both of us collide, we tend to come together

But even if we don’t , I guess we’ll never be far apart

 

Picture Courtesy: Pinterest

Qaid (Captive)

 

नब्ज़ चल तो रही थी ठीक से
पर क़ैद थे अकेलेपन में
जब तूने पत्थर रख दिए तो गिर पड़े
ना उठ सके

तू लम्हा वो, जो ठहरा नही
ये रात का अंधेरा इतना भी गहरा नही
माना फिलहाल तेरे करीब नही
पर ना आ सकूँ तेरे पास
इतना भी सख़्त ये पहरा नही

तेरे साथ बिताए लम्हों की दिल में तस्वीरे हैं
इन्हे देखकर लगता है की जुड़ गयी हमारी तक्दीरे हैं
पर फ़िर मुझे आता है याद
की तू है आज़ाद परिंदों की तरह
जबकि हाथों में मेरे ज़ंजीरिएन हैं

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क्या था वादा तेरा?
की हम नही होंगे जुदा
ना तो ये शब गयी
और ना ही हुई सुबह

तबाह कर दे मुझे
या टूट मुझ मे जा
क़ैद हुआ तेरी यादों में
क़ैद हुआ सौ दफ़ा

Picture courtesy: Pinterest

Seeking acceptance…

I have a friend whose son is 15 years old. He is extremely suicidal and lonely, and finds it  difficult to socialize. His mother left her job to take care of him. One fine day, she was shocked to find blade marks on his wrists. His parents seemed quite worried. When his condition started worsening, they decided to see a doctor.

The doctor examined him comprehensively. After the examination was done, he asked them to see a psychiatrist. As soon as the doctor said this, the boy’s parents began fuming. They chided the doctor and hurled expletives at him.  The father said ” Mera beta pagal nahi hai. Pagalon ka ilaaj Karne waala hi sabse bada Pagal Hota Hai.” (My son isn’t mad. The guy treating the mad guys happens to be a moron.)

Anxiety by ArtistKS.deviantart.com on @DeviantArt

A lot of people in India shy away from talking about mental illness. Lung infections, cancer, and tuberculosis are diseases, but mental illness is not. Mental illness isn’t considered a disease; it’s considered a ‘sin’.  People suffering from mental ailments are frowned upon by people. Recently, I was with a group of colleagues, a majority of whom are fathers. One of them mentioned a colleague who happens to be suffering from a psychological disorder. My colleagues appeared unimpressed and began passing judgments. I could hear one of them saying ” Pagalon ka ilaaj Karne Wala bhi Pagal  hi Hota Hai.”

Various kinds of mental disorders have been recognized throughout the world. Mental disorders are very much curable, but the stigma that comes along is the real problem. Psychiatrists are always willing to help. You need to be a bit open-minded.

We tend to face a lot of pressures in our life. Leave alone the working classes; even children haven’t been spared. Parents want their children to become ‘champions’. Moms and dads want their kids to score 95% in each subject. The problem doesn’t end here. Getting good grades is certainly not enough. A student needs to be a good sportsman as well. Expectations are never-ending.

New Sketches by Sebastien del Grosso

Instead of providing moral support, parents tend to pressurize children endlessly. I remember the day when a very good friend of mine was slapped and insulted by his father for choosing Arts over Science. The pressure was immense, and he had to reconsider his decision. Consequently, his grades declined drastically. Physics wasn’t a cup of tea for him. He found it hard to put two and two together. Life became miserable, and in his panic, he turned to substance abuse.

Well, I fail to understand why do we still hesitate while discussing mental disorders? Why is this topic swept under the carpet? Are we living in the 1820s? Well, I guess we are.  Furthermore, psychology is still not considered a ‘real’ subject.  A friend of mine told me about her father’s reaction when she told him that she wants to pursue psychology  (Hons.) from the Kamala Nehru College for Women, University of Delhi. Her father replied, ” Kya tum Pagalon ki doctor bano gi ?” (Do you want to treat mad people?”)

We need qualified psychologists. Psychology would help us understand human behaviour. Studying psychology would allow people to get to terms with the functioning of the mind. Understanding the mind happens to be the first step towards curing mental illness.

Human beings are quite fascinating, aren’t they? Different people have different opinions.  Getting into the minds of people happens to be an interesting exercise. Doing, thinking, and acting form the core of human behaviour. As a psychologist, you get to experience and understand various aspects of human behaviour. How does the mind work? Why do different people react in different ways? Psychology has all the answers for you.

To conclude:

Mental disorders are just like any other disease. Whenever your throat is in bad shape, you go and see an ENT specialist, don’t you? Similarly, you can get in touch with a psychiatrist if you’re suffering from depression.

Picture courtesy: Pinterest

Revisiting ‘The Third Level’ by Jack Finney

Past is an excellent place to visit, but certainly not a good place to stay. The Third Level by Jack Finney is an engrossing story set in the 1950s. The story is studded with many undertones of irony. It takes you back in time, in a world when people hadn’t seen two of the bloodiest wars in the history of mankind. It goes without saying that people find it hard to come to terms with the ups and downs of everyday life. At times, people tend to hallucinate things. These hallucinations end up providing some transient relief from the trials and tribulations of life. Continue reading “Revisiting ‘The Third Level’ by Jack Finney”